Do512 Family Featured Babymaker and contributing writer, Claudia Weber, has been struggling with what's acceptable for her daughter when it comes to social media. Since this is probably a common theme among parents these days, we thought nosotros'd share her concerns and open up the conversation to our readers.

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How old does your kid take to be to use games and apps that permit online comments and chatting? Twelve? Ten? Vii?

I don't know. I'g sure in that location are many opinions – strong ones – out there. Only lately in our firm we've been trying to figure information technology out and I practise know one thing. It's not easy.

Our girl is 8 and an only child. She'southward a smart kid who's never been a fan of, or smashing at, entertaining herself. Fifty-fifty when she does activities meant for ane, she wants our input and blessing – seriously, fifty-fifty coloring. Then when she gets into something that absorbs her completely, it'southward truly a relief. Her most contempo obsession was a game from National Geographic Kids called Creature Jam. Mayhap you're familiar with it, maybe your kids play information technology, maybe you think it's harmless. I mean, it'southward from National Geographic – information technology must be good. Maybe information technology is, for some kids. Just clearly non all.

www.animaljam.com Where the beasts run wild...
www.animaljam.com  – Where the beasts run wild…

According to the website, " Creature Jam is an online playground for kids where they can larn virtually the natural world while playing with friends." What that really means is that kids, using an e-mail/parental approval to gear up up accounts, create an animal avatar identity that lives in a fictional animal world. While playing, kids can get creative as they accessorize their avatars, decorate their dens, and adopt virtual pets. They interact with ane another through chatting, trading/gifting, or past participating in multiplayer games and parties. They earn gems, which are online currency that allows them to practise even more.

Sounds like fun, and it must be – the game has experienced 500% year-over-year growth with millions of players worldwide (PR Newswire). Our girl learned nigh it from her tertiary-class friends and became instantly addicted.

Every bit her interest grew – and grew, and grew – so did the game's influence on real life. All of a sudden, Animal Jam became all she and her friends would talk about during complimentary moments at schoolhouse. They discussed codes and "glitches" and avatars and gems, all of which was okay for a while. Until she got irrational when nosotros told her it was time to shut downwardly. Or when a "scammer" hacked into her account and took her prized virtual possessions. Or, in a super-proud parental moment (but in all honesty kind of funny), when she casually let it slip that the "just" bad words she'd seen (and aye, we'd fix parental controls and filters) in the game were "f#$1000" and "crap."

We both felt uneasy but my husband, who works in the digital space and has been trying to convince me of social media's "why" since its inception, was more forgiving. He thought the game was okay, the kid was having fun, interacting with others and learning nearly online communications. He didn't want to take information technology away from her – everyone else was doing it!

I, on the other hand, thought eight years old was just too immature – non emotionally mature nor socially aware plenty to handle all of it accordingly. Information technology's hard enough for a kid to get sarcasm and empathize boundaries in real-life, and virtually impossible online.

Ultimately, things came to a caput when we found her sobbing in front of the computer one day, upset nigh a real-life friend who'd taken something from her in the game, and with whom in a serial of live online chats, she began to fight. Her virtual life was interfering with her real, live friendships, punctuated by the fact that she got in trouble at schoolhouse for pushing the friend because she harbored a grudge nigh the fight they had resolved the day before.

That was that – her Animal Jam days were over. Every bit that reality settled in and the angry, disappointed tears subsided, she moved on.

Or so nosotros thought.

Sure, she dove into reading. She had real play dates. She rediscovered crafts she'd abandoned. And so, she stumbled upon Draw Cast, a fairly elaborate digital drawing app.

A plea for help
A plea for help?

Although we wished she'd do something that didn't require a screen, at to the lowest degree it was fine art, correct? We still express her screen time, in keeping with the widely held behavior and recommendations of most parents and "experts" around us. What we didn't realize for weeks, though, was that Draw Cast, besides, had a social media feature that lets user comment on others' or get feedback on their own drawings. Curious but uncomfortable, I began to scroll through her chats.

I don't know why, but I had a visceral reaction to seeing her interactions with other players, despite the fact that both the drawings and the comments were completely innocent. Maybe information technology's because we were burned by Animal Jam. Maybe it's because I'one thousand distrustful and overprotective. Or perhaps it's because one of her comments talked about existence lonely and grateful for the "friends" she'd made on Describe Bandage.  Something well-nigh that bankrupt my centre a little.

So what do we do?

Then again, doesn't really seem like the work of someone sad or troubled.
And then again, doesn't really seem like the work of someone sorry or troubled.

She's having fun, being creative, socializing, learning – literally how to apply the app'south various features – from others. She's communicating in a way that we do all the fourth dimension and that her generation will practice fifty-fifty more. I don't know if I am being ridiculous and one-time-fashioned, trying to buck the obvious trend. After all, seems like everything we do these days has some sort of social media component. Tin can't a kid only have fun?

Of course I want to concur on to her innocence as long equally possible, because I can see what's coming equally she edges towards tween-hood. If that means keeping her away from social media for a few more years, I want to. I hope I'm non fighting a losing battle.

What do you recall?

–Claudia

Claudia Weber is a transplanted Austin mom, local realtor who loves to share the best of Austin with families like hers – whether they're moving to town or just looking to embrace the all-time Austin has to offer. Find out more atwww.claudiasellsaustin.com.